Letting go

I don't think leaving home ever gets easier.

Moving out of a place requires a lot of emotional processing, for me, anyway. It's like going through years of your life in just hours. Sorting through the 'stuff' is like sorting through the 'baggage'.

And the best thing to do before a trip is to pack light. I am purging as much 'baggage' as possible, and in this process, just letting go of things. If thoughts are things, and things are a reflection of thoughts, then letting go of things is a way for me to let go of my old thoughts. Maybe it's like a master cleanse and detoxification for the mind.

Like all cleanses, you retaliate at first as the toxins leave your body. My retaliation came in the form of my 'present self' battling with my 'past self' about whether I should keep something. After many of these battles, my past self has surrendered and realized that it is ridiculous how much stuff we keep and never use.

But the people, connections, and memories that have given me a sense of home for the past few years are the hardest part to let go. So I won't, and will keep these for safe storage in my heart. This way, whenever I look there, I will remember my home no matter where life takes me.

Though our travels are 3 weeks away, this feels like the first step in my journey. With lighter feet, a lighter mind, and a full heart, the end is the beginning...